A good wife is a man’s reward
Finding a good wife is the hardest thing in life! But then, if you make the right choice, there will be a reward for life. There is nothing better in the world than a good, good wife.
Career, money, football, friends – all this is nonsense. The main thing is a family and a wife who is loving, kind, understanding, sacrificial, caring, affectionate, a good mother for children.
This is where you can and should work hard. Unless a man has chosen the path of a monk, when for the sake of God he renounces worldly attachments and does not start a family.
Choose your wife carefully
You don’t have to meet randomly. You should not offer your hand and heart to everyone in a row, so that, looking at the reaction, choose your wife from those who agree. You are insured, but what is it like for a girl? Will you embarrass her and give her hope in vain?
Girls are gentle, trusting creatures, they quickly fall in love and are very worried when their feelings are not reciprocated. Women have a more subjective view of reality than men.
Women trust their feelings more, so they easily believe that someone has fallen in love with them and is going to propose.
Keep this in mind: meet girls, but be very, very careful.
I had many such cases when a girl came to me and said:
– There is a young man, I really like him, I would like to marry him.
“Does he want you to be his wife?” I ask a question.
“I think he likes me too, he smiles at me all the time.
I call the young man:
“There is such and such a girl, do you like her?”
– So so…
– Why are you smiling at her?
I smile at everyone.
Be careful not to smile at everyone. Be restrained and careful, do not make unnecessary promises.
See what she writes on social networks
If you are looking closely at an Orthodox girl, I advise you to go to her parish before you meet. See who she goes to confession to, talk to this priest. Tell him that you like this girl. Ask if you can meet her. Maybe she is already engaged, waiting for a groom from the army and therefore walks alone. Or maybe she is not in the mood to get married and is preparing for monasticism. The confessor will warn you about this and give you advice that will help you avoid getting into an awkward situation.
But the meaning is not only that the girl’s confessor will give you advice. It is important to find out with whom your future wife will solve spiritual and family problems.
It is very good to know what kind of person this is, what kind of priest this is. Is he strict, are you ready to recognize his authority.
Find out more about the girl before meeting. See what she writes on her social networks, who her friends are, what her interests are. It happens that a girl is Orthodox in appearance, but on her page you don’t understand what: she is “in active search” and believes that you can demonstrate your beauties, discuss some inappropriate topics. This happens, unfortunately, be careful. Before you get acquainted, take a closer look, think, weigh all the pros and cons.
How to take the first step?
It is better not to start with a decisive step. It is very binding. Sometimes friends invite lonely people to visit with the intention of introducing them. In this case, both know which meeting they are going to, and it can be awkward.
It’s better to chat casually. For example, you found out that the girl is a volunteer. Sign up to volunteer, go to meetings, sit next to a girl during a tea party or at a concert, talk casually.
When you take the first step – inviting a girl to the cinema or for a walk – you already impose some obligations on yourself.
Therefore, it is better to get acquainted by chance, gradually. In order not to hurt the girl, not to reassure her in vain if you cannot marry her later.
Don’t look for the perfect look
Some people like blondes, some brunettes. Some are slim, some are plump. I had a friend who was looking for a wife with glasses. He thought if she wore glasses, she would certainly be smart. Someone would like his wife to sing beautifully.
But you should not focus on the appearance of the girl. You need to pray to God and ask that the marriage be according to the will of God. It is most important. First of all, you need to think about what kind of heart she has, does she know how to love sacrificially, does she love children, is she ready to educate them, is she neat, is she ready to respect your opinion? These qualities are essential in marriage.
No matter how beautiful the girl is, you will not put her in a corner and admire her for thirty years.
In the end, she will grow old, her hair will turn gray, there will be changes in her figure. But you don’t get married in order to brag to your friends, but in order to live life next to her. So that she loves you, that she tolerates you, that she cooks for you, that she helps you. You yourself are far from “Apollo”.